Have you you ever done that? Given over, given up an augment or dispute just for peace? That was my life until I realised that there are times that I should take pride in the fact that I am not the same as my family.
“There are times when we should take pride in the fact that we are NOT the same as everyone else.”
If you are anything like myself, Louise (and if I may say like my wife Heather) you have found yourself in situations where you are saying ‘No, this doesn’t feel right, or No, this is not my normal’ and yet others around you are unquestionably going with the common flow of society.
Were you, like me, the one who at school would put up your hand and ask ‘that type of question’ that would get the raised eyebrows and the ‘go sit out side the heads office?’ Did you feel as you were growing up, and even more so as an adult that you just didn’t fit in with the ‘human’ world? Often feeling as if you were on the outside looking in.
Have you at times yearned to be included, but had this voice inside that told you that you would never fit in until you found your tribe, your family, the missing bits of you.
Yet there is still the feeling that we need to safeguard and protect, due to the remaining sense of being judged on our difference.





“Sometimes we never fit in, until we find our tribe! Our tribe are those that resonate beyond the ‘blood’ issue of family.”
I for one grew tired of the shadows, no sun, always waiting for permission to speak, act, play, smile, etc. So I stepped into the sunshine, I took action and told myself, being the odd one in my family was okay by me. It didn’t matter if they ignored me, which they have done, I would be Okay.
You know, stepping out of the expectations of my family was a huge thing for me, it meant that a) I didn’t have to live up to what they thought was best for me, b) it gave me the freedom to make mistakes and to actually learn something. c) I could see them for who they were, fallible, loveable, irritating, family. They weren’t some immovable force that I had to contend with.
Life has a way of bringing us full circle. In my journey I have learnt that you are just fine by me with your fallibility, your weakness (which can turn to strengths) I can accept the fact that you like being alone but hate being lonely. I identify with those of you that have this ‘noise’ in your head that you just can’t explain to others, and no your not mad. The greatest freedom I got was when someone told me “Sometimes being Okay is all that’s required. You don’t have to do something, just because someone said jump.
You are your own person, and if your waiting for someone else to give you permission to be who you really are, you’ve got a long wait.
No one wants to admit they have an odd ball in the family. Everyone want to have the picture perfect family, so that they’re not judged by society. Don’t wait for permission too be who you are from someone else, step up and try it out for yourself.
You may just like it.
Being different is no more unacceptable than being ‘normal,’ in fact I’d rather be different than normal. I don’t want to ‘fit in’ and be like the rest of the crowd. I’d rather be the black sheep that the rest of the white sheep look at and wonder ‘what the….?’
You see life is not going to wait for you, it’s going to keep going on and when you’ve lived your life trying to fit in and not offend people, you’ll discover that being normal was not for you. That you are a critical thinker, that life is not a ‘9-5’ existence but an adventure that can only be experience by being the ‘nutter,’ the ‘weird one,’ the ‘black sheep of the family,’ so if your time has come, if your ready to claim your stand of being different then stand up and tell yourself exactly that.
It’s Okay to be Different!
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